Soooooo Close..

So I sorta broke my stall...sorta. Now instead of bouncing back and forth between 183-180 I am bouncing between 179-180. I'll take it. I am now 7 lbs away from being 100 lbs down!

Craziness.....and I am not mad that I haven't hit 172 yet.... because here is the comparison.

Long before surgery and probably close to my biggest of 272...very unhappy.

Me last weekend at 179 lbs!

By the way I went out in public INCLUDING a restaurant and pumping gas like this and didn't even care! hehe

Also, I have some good news. The stressful work situation is now resolved. I moved to a different department at work so the great source of recent stress in my life is more or less gone. I feel even more energetic and like I can concentrate on more important things. Granted...I took a pay cut. But sometimes your sanity is much more important than money. It's fucking priceless thank you.

So if you can't tell roller derby is more or less an obsession of mine. I just love it. It has been helping keep me sane as things had escalated at work. Never underestimate how much better hitting someone can make you feel after a horrible day :) 

Now that I have a bit more focus since my mind isn't preoccupied with work crap, I am starting a workout challenge. You can find it on FB and its the Roller Derby Workout Challenge 2012  . I started late but am doing the workouts and going more with the nutrition guidelines closer to when I was first pre op, except a bit more calories obviously.  

I just finished day 1, and since my practice days are on different days (tomorrow and thu) I swapped the workout days. So today I did the Roller Derby Workout DVD. Ladies, I reccomend this. even if you don't skate or even own a pair, it is an awesome workout. I am feeling the burn. 50 minute workout and it kicked my ass :)  

I am going to be sure to update on my progress through this challenge as I am very excited to see what sort of results I can get out of this, both healthwise as well as what I can bring to my game. This is going to be my first season and I want to be the best I can :)

See ya soon!

Jenn

Downer Day

Blah.


That's how I feel today. Slightly moody. Maybe like everyone says its just hormones being released from the fat they were previously trapped in. Also I am back in the office today and while I am happy to see most people here I just feel annoyed by others. No negative surgery comments however which is nice.

I wish I could go back home though. I guess since I can't eat away these feelings any longer I am going to try and take a relaxing walk tonight once the sun goes down so it isn't too hot out. The heat really makes my incisions itchy and irritated.

I have other stuff on my mind too, like a horrible stupid dream I had the other night that just kind of messed with me a little too much and hit close to home. Also I didn't mention (because I was in a good mood and didn't want to talk about it) but on saturday I got into a minor car accident. Thank Goodness I didnt get ticketed...the cop must have been in a good mood. And the people are willing to work with me instead of going through insurance (my car got wayyyyy more damage anyways -_- ). But nonetheless still sucks. I guess I am off my island of solitude and the real world is hitting full force and I just don't want to deal with it right now.

Anyways..things will work out...they always do. At the very least I keep telling myself that and things really do seem to have a way of working out if I put in a little effort. I got my credit check back and everything looks good for me to start the second job...so there is that...

but now comes the next hurdle. Getting Robert's car fixed and making sure there is a way for me to keep lainey from barking while I am working. My uncle gave me some ideas to sound proof my home office for less and I will probably invest in a better noise canceling headset. But it all takes money.

That's all for now. Just breathing, making myself drink my protein and water, and reminding myself that what I am going through is probably a normal part of this process. I did my make up today and painted my nails last night, so trying to tell myself today that I look very pretty. People at work have been saying they can already see a big difference. For me looking in the mirror I may as well be in a fun house because some days I see it and some days I really don't.