Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Weight Loss Surgery Woes

I am not sure if its the whole PMS thing rearing its ugly head once again but I feel scared about surgery the past few days. I think positive and tell myself that the surgery itself will go fine but I still get scared about complications...

When someone posts on the forum about a complication they had it terrifies me though...because it can happen. But I am going to be brave, use positive imagery, whatever have to. I have done my research...my doctor can do this and if I do have a complication he is capable of fixing it.

My other big fear is the after effects of surgery, aside from the positive one of being able to get down to my goal weight. Extra skin... loss of elasticity. What if I get down to goal only to have a bunch of extra skin hanging off of me? Sure I will be healthier but...I want to look nice.

I know that the main area of concern is my tummy and boobs... I am not too worried about my arms, and legs or even my butt. Maybe I have youth on my side. I am just turned 26 in November... I dont know. :(

I need to accept that this could be an issue, because I do not want to back down from my decision to have weight loss surgery. I have been doing some research, some reading and while it may suck when I see myself naked, at the very least I can work my ass off to build up muscle and tone up whatever I can for 2 years after reaching goal... and then if it IS bad... I will save up and I will have plastic surgery. I am only allowing myself that for my boobs and tummy if it really is an issue... If I still have a small pooch I think I can live with that though. In fact, regardless I need to accept and love myself... with or without imperfections or ones that could occur.

Maybe that is even more scary than what could happen after surgery. Truly accepting yourself and loving yourself is to me, probably an even harder task than choosing to do this surgery.


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